D.Greaves http://dgreaves.posterous.com Well Veresed. Never Rehearsed. posterous.com Fri, 04 Feb 2011 05:39:00 -0800 A FADE INTO OBLIVION http://dgreaves.posterous.com/a-fade-into-oblivion http://dgreaves.posterous.com/a-fade-into-oblivion

Fade

I sit today warmed by the memory 

of your smile

and in remorse remembering my 

voluntary exile from your love sweet

my mother had never heard her son 

truly recite

doesnt know the depths of pain 

I enter 2 write

the migraines

the shame

the blame

the stain 

upon my soul i feebly attempt

2 explain

in verse

the curse

and audible curses aimed at the spirits

many know dgreaves the poet

if only through the snippets of my soul

I expose

yet no one truly knows

the man

born and shaped by volcanic sand

ready 2 erupt after years of being dormant

and so

I walked away from you in the infancy 

of a promising future

2 protect you from my past

under such duress

we couldnt hope 2 last

or prosper

and the oscar 

goes 2

me

the dee 

I could not 4 the sake of you

allow you 2 see

many

wonder 

few know

tone knew

was his self inflicted demise

due  2 

my refusal of friendship

in his most troubled hour

I dont know

yet my stomach is sour

when i recall the chronology of events

ive spent 

so much time within myself

I see the world through

a myopic vision

I love and yet refuse love

I give and am loathe 2 receive

I take nothing and 

out of life and love

expect nothing

and yet 

curiously 

I feel free

free of imagined reality

free of the worlds testimony

free of dreams that curse me 

with hope and promise

my mother weeps 4 me she says

blames herself i know 4 what

I have come 2 beI

I tell her no

the very second i decided 2 be a man

my destiny 

or lack thereof  was in my hands

this is my plan

as I fade into oblivion

the son of volcanic sand

my ears have been much 2 accute

2 reverberations of implied threats

so I

in my fury 

make them real

I need 2 feel

my blood boil

and erupt through the corpustles

in my troubled head

saturating the soil

my soul brother asked 

why do i write so prolific

so darn much

he said it is as if i am running out of time

nah brah

time is up

has been 33 years

since i first learned that tears

falling from a man

born of volcanic sand

is not release

but feeds the beast 

of my burden

for certain

the quill has been both blessing and curse

4 every verse 

is a snapshot i submit

4 public 

perception

why is the question

my life has never been mine

until now

a baby of barbados

a child of dysfunction

a teen

in the mean 

streets

an adult eloquent 

yet incomplete

and now

a revolutionary in voluntary exile

from love

from feeling

from emotion

from devotion

from life

as michael jackson once sang

like a comet 

blazing cross the evening sky

gone 2 soon

but i am still alive

or am I

another question 2 ponder

as i fade into oblivion

comfrotable  am I

that finally

the choice was mine

and mine alone

 

lyrics  to gone too soon

by michael jackson

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